Sleepover

Rachael had Lexie and Logan over to spend the night. We went to see the new "Christmas Carol" at Stonybrook theatre which I thought was awesome! The whole movie was 3D and I actually felt as though I was in the movie flying!! It's much too scary for little kids 6 and under. Some parts even scared me!
Afterwards we came home and they played games and rough housed a bit. They brought the new Night in the Museum 2 movie (Smithsonian?) and I couldn't stay awake if my life depended on it. I crashed and let them have the run of the place. I spent Sunday morning in the kitchen making 2 huge pots of sauce for my lasagnas while the kids took up where they left off the night before. After we dropped the kids off Rachael told me that she had a great weekend and thanked me. Sweet!

Little Lopsided Xmas Tree

Collaborate effort by little Theresia & George - assembly, big Theresia (that's me) - lights and garlands, Rachael & Kendall - ornaments and candy canes.









OK, so I asked Theresia and George to assemble my 6 year old, $13.99 X-mas tree for me. In 2003, on the very 1st Xmas in our new home, Lauren and I went to Wal-Mart at 3am in the morning to get that tree. The branches are color coded and I always pack them in groups so that the following year I have no problems. Well, apparently T & G had some trouble. I came home to find 2 extra branches on the coffee table and the tree itself was somewhat lumpy looking.
I'm not really complaining, I'm mostly laughing at those 2 geniuses. I left it alone. Things were looking up once my favorite white lights, wooden cranberry beads and fake popcorn were on. Rachael and Kendall put up the ornaments and I put on our new star. This year we finally have a tree skirt that I picked up from Target. Hey! It's not that bad! :o)

Little Las Vegas in Jeffersonville

This house is two homes down from Rachael's dad's house on Sportsman drive in Jeffersonville, IN. Every year, just when you think they've reached the maximum and can't "do no more", they up the wattage. What does their electrical bill look like for the month of December? What does the inside of their house look like? Do they have Xmas toilet seats?

Bad, bad day

Can I say it's been a one crappy day? I've spent most of my day either on the verge of tears or in tears. I think it's hormones combined with some financial worries and horrible dental pain. I'm positive I have cavities and my jaw throbs like a son-of-a-gun! UL Dental school can't see me until sometime January so I called my dentist Kenny (who, by the way, years ago my daughters thought was cute). I hadn't been to see him since May 08! When I asked the receptionist if they could do a payment plan for me she told me that he didn't do that anymore. So I asked her "Is there any way that you could take my name and number and just check for me? Tell him it's Theresia from Delta." She called me back in less than a half hour and told me it wasn't a problem. Thank God!
The other issues? Our office was just informed today that our hours were being cut back starting next week. Now I know it's only 4 hours a week, but that's 17+ hours a month and for someone like me who lives from paycheck to paycheck, it means something is not going to get paid. Take the loss in pay and combine it with imminent dental bills and the possibility of needing a bloody brake job - it's a bit more than just a minor setback. It's a major downer!! Plus Christmas is coming. Ugh(*@&#^.
Now I will say that I probably will wake up in the morning and feel that things are pretty groovy again. It's just the way I am. I'll be back to my usual cheerful self - all the negativity rolled off in my sleep and then I'll wonder "What the hell was wrong with me yesterday?" I have to admit that I'm lucky that way... and, on top of it, I'm appreciative about what I do have. I have a great family for one. I not only have a full-time job that I love, but a 2nd, part-time job that's cake. I have a roof over my family's head, food in the pantry and heat! And, for now, I still have the internet. Wow! That's a lot of good stuff! I actually feel better just writing about it!

Evanescence

I would love to see them in concert! Beautiful, haunting, powerful vocals, lyrics, instrumentals & visual artistry.

Oh Sunny Day!

It was a little cool, but so sunny and cheerful outside on Saturday. I threw open the windows and I made my "to do" list. It was pretty short. I went to Good Will to poke around and found a pair of leather boots in Rachael's size (see below), went to the bank to get some money to go grocery shopping, then hit Kroger's. I have almost everything I need to make the sausage & basil lasagna everybody raved over last year. I also found a recipe in my New England Cookbook for a zucchini pie made with Bisquick, cheeses, eggs, oregano, etc. It actually sounds good so I tested it. We went on an archeological dig to get the Xmas decorations out of the shed, cleaned Rachael's room, mopped the kitchen and living room floors and last, but not least, made time to take Rachael, Kendall & Vicky to the movies.
OK, the zucchini pie smelled and tasted great, but was a little soggy in the middle. I had deliberately added extra zucchini which probably had too much moisture. Also, I probably should have made doubly sure that I pressed as much moisture as I could out of the zucchini with the paper towels. Rachael really liked it (surprising for someone who isn't the hugest fan of that particular vegetable). Li'l T loved it and said it would be a great side dish for a steak! I really thought it would make a great main dish for a vegetarian dinner. The boots were too small for Rachael at 8 1/2 so I imagine that she's a size 9 now. We went to pick Lauren up from work and shopped at Marshall's for a couple of hours. All I ended up getting were a set of holiday dish towels, cute Xmas cards, and a star for our Xmas tree...I think that's pretty much it!

PUMPKIN TORTE RECIPE

I'm in the middle of making this cake to send to my mother's house for Thanksgiving. Someone who knows a lot about good food told me this recipe was awesome! It's a good thing I'm not getting any of it. See Below...

• 10-12 Servings
• Prep: 30 min. Bake: 25 min. + cooling

Ingredients

• 1 package (18-1/4 ounces) yellow cake mix
• 1 can (15 ounces) solid-pack pumpkin, divided
• 1/2 cup milk
• 4 eggs
• 1/3 cup canola oil
• 1-1/2 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice, divided
• 1 package (8 ounces) cream cheese, softened
• 1 cup confectioners' sugar
• 1 carton (16 ounces) frozen whipped topping, thawed
• 1/4 cup caramel ice cream topping
• 1/3 cup chopped pecans, toasted

Directions

• In a large bowl, combine the cake mix, 1 cup pumpkin, milk, eggs, oil and 1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice; beat on low speed for 30 seconds. Beat on medium for 2 minutes. Pour into two greased and floured 9-in. round baking pans.
• Bake at 350° for 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean. Cool for 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks to cool completely.
• In a large bowl, beat the cream cheese until light and fluffy. Add the confectioners' sugar, and remaining pumpkin and pumpkin pie spice; beat until smooth. Fold in whipped topping.
• Cut each cake horizontally into two layers. Place bottom layer on a serving plate; spread with a fourth of the filling. Repeat layers three times. Drizzle with caramel topping; sprinkle with pecans. Store in the refrigerator.
• . Yield: 10-12 servings.

Another Famous Lauren Quote

Rachael is thrilled b/c Lauren is spending the night and the two of them are up at this unlikely hour laughing and chatting away. Timmy is working nights this week and Theresia was kind enough to pick Lauren up at 11pm from her new job at Target. So... I'm just sitting in the bathroom - with the door wide open (as usual), not minding my own business and eavesdropping so to speak (I have no manners), when I hear Lauren say "I hate working. It's so inconvenient! I could be studying, sleeping or watching TV...". OMG!! - that cracked me up! Not that she's serious (nor is she completely joking either :o), but I'm sure that it's hard to go back to work after being off for while and trying to keep on top of her studies at the same time. People do it all the time though and I know she's be just fine - she's always been very industrious.
Lauren is in college for Justice and Public Safety Administration(I think that's right) - doing really great! We always thought that she would be in either the military or law enforcement of some kind because she has such a strong sense of right/wrong, justice for all, and finding the truth. I've always thought she had a powerful personality. I found an old birthday card I had given to her years ago. When she was 17 years old I wrote "You are so strong, proud & honorable, yet tender & deep. I believe you will make a difference in this world. I believe in you."

Another Kendallism

Yesterday was Theresia's birthday. She's 28 years old. It was pretty tame. I made a simple baked fish dinner with rice, green beans and a salad. She requested pumpkin pie instead of cake so we sat in the kitchen, sang around the pie and she made her yearly wish. As Kendall hugged her mom for the hundredth time she asked "Why does everybody close their eyes every time they hug? Every time?!" Well, I guess I close my eyes to cut off visual sense and "feel the hug" more. It's involuntary. At least that's what I think happens. What do you think?

Back to the Grind

I hadn't gone to the gym regularly for nearly a month - maybe 3 times a week. Then last week I did yard work for 6 hours straight and worked a half day almost all week at my work's sister company doing warehouse work like making boxes and assembly. I was pretty tired at the end of each day (not used to all that "hard" labor) so I skipped the gym all together for the week.
Yesterday & today I went back and really pushed myself. I felt great the first day! But today? Stiff and sore for some reason. I got some ribbing from the regulars...I call them my Y buddies, but also plenty of encouragement. I don't have a personal trainer, but Jeff (my occasional trainer) keeps tabs on my workouts and leaves messages for me. He thinks I'm past ready for adding some more reps in and kicking it up a notch but I'm so limited on time! I've increased my weights instead. I pretty much squeeze everything I can in the hour and fifteen minutes I'm there. I'm slowly going down to my pre-binging weight again, but if I'm honest with myself, I want to lose the weight so that I can eat lots of Thanksgiving Dinner. That's if there are any left overs.
I have to work all Thanksgiving Day and I just added another job for the Friday after - I wish to God that I didn't have to do it but I don't have a choice (or I should say that I don't give myself the choice). Rachael will be with her dad for those 2 days and I need Xmas money. So why not?
We were supposed to have Lexie & Logan this coming weekend but they found out that they're going with their mom to Indy. Rachael was disappointed...and I hate that, but she'll get over it. She has new friends from school so I think we'll invite a couple of them over in a couple of weekends and maybe have a sleepover.

No Honor Roll Bumper Sticker - Again

It's report card day and still Rachael has yet to make all A's & B's. That dratted C has snuck in once again - this time in Social studies class! She went from a B+ to a C! But all her other grades went up, including the one C from last grading period that she had in science which is now an A-. I know that she can do better if she just applies herself! I want one of those bumper stickers that say MY CHILD IS AN HONOR ROLL STUDENT AT _______! Arghh! Oh well, she did kick it up a notch in her other classes so I can't complain - too much. She's a great kid and her teachers have told me that she's made a lot of friends with some good girls. Well, that eases my mind some. still want that bumper sticker though...maybe next time.

Blackacre Nature Preserve & Historic Homestead

Right down the road from us is a wonderful historical homestead that sits on about 271 acres. Read more about it on their website. www.blackacreconservancy.org Yesterday was such a beautiful day that I couldn't bear to do chores. Although I could have spent the afternoon raking leaves, instead we went to hike the well established trails (with sporadic signage, no less) on the Blackacre property. Occasionally, you'd see orange plastic markers on trees in some areas where the trail seemed to fall off so that you knew that you were still on the right path.

Rachael was really engrossed for the most part but at one point she started talking about her cell phone. So I said "Rachael, let's not talk about cell phones. Let's really just focus on where we are right now and be in the moment." Do you know she understood that? It was another fabulous afternoon as we breathed deeply of fallen leaves, listened to trees rustle and birds commune. Rachael spotted a bird so tiny it was hardly bigger than hummingbird but we knew it couldn't be because of how it flew. We picked our way over tree roots and rocks, jumped over small streams and sometimes would pull up short to listen to whatever was moving in the underbrush near us, hoping to get a glimpse. Life is good. I hope to help Rachael develop a deeper appreciation & respect for our mother earth.






This morning we 're going to church, heading over to Elizabeth's house for a bit and then...we're going back. It's another gorgeous day and I want to be outside. My sister Kristina and her family are coming. I hope Elizabeth feels up to it. We'd like to explore another area and look in the buildings of the actual homestead and farm. They do have farm animals. Maybe if we're lucky we can catch a horse and buggy ride. I can rake next weekend after more leaves fall and Rachael's visiting her dad.

Friday the 13th Slumber Party

Rachael went to her friend, Airiel's (Hope I've spelled this right), slumber party yesterday. It was Friday the 13th and she turned 13 (she is 2nd from the right). We picked Selena (far right) up on the way. So guess what movie they rented? You guessed it - Friday the 13th!! From what I was told, the girls got halfway through the movie and were too frightened to finish watching it, so they played the Beatles Rock Band instead. That's Ashley on the left, another girl from school. Vicky (the mom) asked me to pick the girls up anytime between 10am - 12pm sp naturally I was there at 9:50 sharp, ready to collect my precious. Ahem..

Lucky Guy's Feminine Side

Lucky had his face trimmed for free and now he looks like a sissy dog. Look at him! There was one time when I picked him up from the groomers they actually had put little blue bows on each ear! I laughed so hard that I almost wet myself! Right now, a little bow on each ear would not look the least bit out of place. Lucky Guy in drag!

New kid on the block

Sandy (my boss) and Karen have just adopted another little Yorkie. His name is Jake and he is the sweetest, most adorable little thing. He's 5 years old. It ALMOST makes me want one! He spent several hours in the office visiting us all. I wonder how Sampson (Sandy's other Yorkie) is doing. He's been an only child for so long!

At the Pediatrician

I took Rachael to get her school physical and update her immunizations. They gave her a shot in each arm and she squeezed the heck out my fingers with her suddenly dripping hands!! The Dr said that she was 90th percentile height and over the acceptable weight (which I knew). So we talked about healthy eating and exercise. He said 45 minutes 5 -7 days a week. OK, we are fairly active on the weekends, but when I think about coming home at 6 - and it's already getting dark, preparing dinner, eating dinner, showers, getting ready for the next day...I think WHEN? I go to the gym at 5am 3-4 times a week, but I can't wake Rachael up that early. It was easier when the days were longer, she's walk the dog or ride her bike all over the place...but now? I do have a great idea though. Sometimes Rachael and I (& Kendall) will crank up the tunes and dance in the kitchen. What if we do that every night for 20 minutes to start - around 4 days a week?
When he asked if we discussed the birds and the bees, I swear I saw Rachael roll her eyes! She wasn't her usual bubbly self, in fact she seemed very remote and quiet, especially after she found out that she had to undress to her skivvies and put on a paper gown. They were out of the regular seasonal flu shots and had been waiting for nearly a month for a shipment - rats!

Too Cute!

Rachael & I showed up at Kendall's preschool to pick her up and there she was playing dress-up, plaid skirt over her blue jeans, a floppy blue hat and an armfull of big colorful posable flowers. She is always starving after school and I'm such a meanie because I give her a small piece of fruit and make her wait an hour for dinner. Well, honestly - she appreciates whatever I put in front of much better...most of the time. Tonight it's going to be homemade chicken vegetable soup. Mmm Mmm Good for you!

Beth & Mick

My friends Beth and Mick were Victorian Vampires for Halloween. You would have to see the whole costume for the full effect - she's an artist and a perfectionist, so there was a lot of meticulous detail in her apparel. They may or may not be slightly inebriated here and I'm not saying.

German made knives

One year when the kids asked me what I wanted for Xmas, I finally had an answer. I wanted a good prep knife. But weeks before Christmas, my manager's mother bought herself new knives and gave me her block of German made Wusthof Dreizack knives. *the picture shown here is just an example* It was missing a few pieces but they were still in perfect condition (to me anyway) and all I had to do was get them sharpened for a couple of bucks at Campbell's Gourmet Cottage. They are WONDERFUL!! I don't consider myself a materialistic person in general (someone else might), but I do have an deep appreciation for fine things - especially free or super inexpensive fine things. One day I'll replace the other pieces, but I'm in no hurry.

Rachael To Work

I took Rachael to work today since there was no school Thursday or Friday. She begs me all the time to bring her. It was kind of quiet though since it was Friday and we usually reserve that day for catch-up paperwork, meetings, etc.
Still, she ran some errands for me within the office and then we had free Cuban sandwiches compliments of a very nice man, Reynaldo, who's daughter I had found a job for. Rachael did have some moments of boredom but that was to be expected. Her DS ran out of juice and she lost the home charger. A good book that she's been going on & on about, she left at school, so....I have lots of pictures that she drew for me. Plus she made a Thank You card for Sandy (for letting her visit today) I took pictures of her and some of my co-workers. Sandy had her eyes closed and I didn't realize it until after. Oh well!

JACK The Survivor

This is Jack. Rachael and I carved him to life on the night of Halloween and put him outside like a beacon to potential trick or treaters. Normally this is a quiet neighborhood on Halloween and we get few visitors, but this year I guess with all the new kids in the neighborhood - we were busy! I know we answered door at least 30 times!! We even had 2 small wagons pull up...complete with haybales. Loved it!
Anyway, Jack is still hanging in there and I for one appreciate his spooky, flickering grin. It makes me wish that I had a fireplace though. Maybe one year I'll look into a buck stove or something like that.

Veteran's Park - J-Town KY

Since I took a day's vacation to be home with Rachael, I decided to get some chores done too. But, besides running my errands, we took the time to split a muffin and share a cup of coffee at My Favorite Muffin and check out some small trails behind the scene at Veteran's Park in J-town. We took Lucky with us because it's so close and he never gets to travel anywhere (poor guy suffers from motion sickness). Thankfully, he didn't puke once - although I did have a sheet over the passenger side...just in case. We walked around and then Rachael remembered that there were trails in the wooded area on the outskirts of the small park. It really was so much fun!
The first trail ended up at a stream and we followed it even though it became what looked like little more than a thin, faded wildlife path. When we came to a section that sloped steeply towards the water and was too slippery to cross, we turned back. We kept going in and out of the woods, following little trails here and there, pretending that we were on an adventure. Lucky didn't like to be in front going towards the unknown, but man, heading back...he took charge, nose to the ground the entire way!
I feel so good right now and it's the simple things. I had dinner ready in 30 minutes, Kendall ate all her penne with meat sauce (she usually doesn't like pasta) and Theresia got off of work at a halfway decent time. Right now the girls are in bed with Theresia laughing hysterically at the stories that she's telling about me. I need to write them down sometime...even if a couple of them are not exactly flattering :o)

ex-boyfriend

Every so often I'll get a forward email that I may be able to send to my co-workers, but I could never send to my conservative family because it might be a more than a little twisted. I'll laugh and almost always think to myself "I wish I could forward this to Kelly. He'd get a kick out of it." But I hadn't spoken with him for a several months. Well last week I broke the ice by sending a forward to him and requesting a recipe. He immediately responded and we chatted via email for a couple of days then suddenly - dead space. Is it my breath? (Ha!)
Rachael and Lexie have been keeping in touch and Lexie asked to say hi to me last week. So I got on the phone and I've got to say it felt so good to talk to her - I do miss them. So today, I took a vacation day because Rachael is out of school. Rachael was on the phone with Lexie and kept coming to me, while still on the phone with her, to ask if I could take her to Lexie's house, or if we could take Lexie and Logan to the park, etc, etc. I felt put on the spot especially when I had some errands to run and didn't know what my schedule would be. I said no and told Rachael to be off the phone in 5 minutes. Rachael came in to my room looking so forlorn with tears in her eyes and told me that she really missed Lexie.
What could I do? So I picked up the phone and called Kelly at work to see if I could take the kids to the park for a couple of hours. I had to leave a message. So then I tried to call Lexie to ask her to to try and reach her dad for permission - Kelly answered. I was caught off guard and it was more awkward than I imagined. Over the phone, I felt like I was talking to a stranger that I wasn't even sure that I liked anymore. It really was awful. It was weird and all I wanted to do was get off the phone...but not before I got a play date for the kids on the weekend after Thanksgiving. Which, by the way, I did and I can't wait!! I think I can deal with some awkwardness if it means the girls (and Logan, of course) can visit on occasion. I don't think that I even have to see Kelly in order to do that. Maybe we could get past the uncomfortableness of our past relationship. huh

Wild Child

Here's Kendall on her wheels with Freddie (our closet skeleton). I bought that Halloween outfit 2 years ago and she's finally deigned to wear it although I think she still wants to be a black cat for Halloween.

Lucky and Kendall

Lucky is in a Love/Hate relationship with Kendall. She tortures him and can never, ever leave him alone. He occasionally does that little nip (not breaking skin) that dogs do when they're saying "Leave me in Peace for Christ's sake!" But does she care? No! The bottom line though is that Lucky misses her when she's not around and is ecstatic when she's back home. Awwww...

George: Theresia's new boyfriend

They are a cute couple! I like George, he seems like a nice guy, but I also am cautious as well for Theresia's sake. He's a certified Arborist, is first year Law school at UL, from a very conservative family, doesn't touch alcohol or smoke cigarettes, much less drugs. He follows a very healthy life style, is active and encourages T to do the same. He's also close to his family and very intelligent. He sounds like just the kind of young man any mother would love. Most importantly, he's crazy about Theresia. And it looks like she's crazy about him too. They talk for at the very least an hour every night.

The only troubling thing is that his parents are not too excited about an older woman (by 3 years) with a young child, of Dominican descent - in a relationship with their pride and joy!! Theresia & George went to 2 weddings these past couple of weeks and she met his family for one of them this past weekend. Hopefully, in meeting her, they've overcome some of their prejudices. Theresia is cute and charming with a splash of snappy wit. Most women want to take her under their wings and mother her. Well, we shall see how this all plays out. Will his parents change their tune and be accepting of her or will they continue to disapprove? Will George stand strong for Theresia? Or will he stumble?

Changes: Good and Bad

Theresia's been looking for a job since she was laid off in February. I know that she's been trying to find something administrative during normal business hours but it's tough out there. So...when a position came open from 10am -6:30pm (usually closer to 8pm) at a packaging company, she accepted it. Even though it's not the type of work that she's used to and it pays a good deal less, she's hopes that by getting her foot in the door there may be opportunity to move up. The good thing is that it's only 7 minutes from the house. The bad is that preschool will take more than half of the money she brings home, however Kendall will thrive with all the stimulation. Rachael walks home occasionally now, sometimes Elizabeth picks her up, sometimes her dad. I hadn't planned to start nursing school until the summer anyway, but until Theresia moves to 1st shift I may end up delaying further because someone has to take care of the girls in the evening. Part time LPN classes are from 5:30-9:45pm Monday thru Thursday for 2 years. After that, RN will be full time for a year. Somehow we'll make it all work.

Innocent Question

Theresia just told me that Kendall asked her where all the mommy long-leg spiders were. That is SO adorable! But really. Why are they called "daddy" long-legs? I'll have to google that. I love those simple questions and you know Kendall is really wondering. Sometimes children ask the type of questions that philosophers are still pondering over, about the world, the universe, God, death. Stuff I can't even wrap my mind around...
I've been with the same company for 15 1/2 years! It's my home away from home with my 2nd family and we all love each other. Occasionally there are days when my co-workers and I would say we couldn't wait to get home and have a glass of wine. Usually because we've had either a great busy day or a bad busy day or a slow day (which can wear on you just as bad). By the time I get home and spend anytime around my children, I can't explain it but it's like within minutes, all is good in the world.
OK now, I'm not saying that there haven't been times where my older daughter's as teenagers haven't almost driven me to the bottle. Now that would be a lie! (And the reality is I do love wine, port *in the fall*, liquors, tequila, martinis, etc. I've just become more of a special occasion drinker.) But on the whole, just being around my girls re-energizes and grounds me at the same time. I hope that I do the same for them. I'm not big into country music buy there are a few I like. Lee Ann Womack's "I Hope You Dance" That's so pretty, heartfelt and what all mother's want for their daughters (and sons).

Lauren's old costume

I found this buried in a box in the shed with some other Halloween stuff. It's part of a Mummy Queen costume that I bought at Caufields for Lauren years ago. The problem is that I can't locate the cool crown and medallion so we'll have to improvise. If we go with this idea then I'm going to paint her face like Cleopatra. I'm just concerned because I think the under-dress is too snug fitting on Rachael. It's really an adult costume for someone taller and meant to reveal curves. Sooo...maybe not. Unless - I can come up with another under dress. Well, we have a whole month. I want to be a spider infested zombie. Or just a plain old white sheet with 2 holes Ghost! I love October!! I love Halloween!!!

I sanded and scraped Rachael's walls and washed them down with some old Soilex that I found under my sink. You can't buy that stuff anywhere anymore and it was the best! I wonder why? We're going to prime everything Tuesday night and then paint the following Monday. Rachael loves blues and greens so we're going to decide between a pretty mossy green or a blue that has a little more gray in it to remind her of the ocean. Then I have to set up the white iron bunk bed that she inherited from her cousin Suzanna. Most of what I furnished my house with has been either handed down or bought at Good Will, yard sales or dragged home from the side of the road. OK, I realize some things were better left on the curb, but I'm comfortable with furniture that I can put my feet up on and not worry about scratches or dents. There are a couple of pieces that have potential to be really pretty one day if I can ever have them slipcovered.

Theresia's embarrassed by the junkie, hodge-podge, mismatched look of my small home, but I guess it's a part of who I am. I love yard sales and Good Will! Don't get me wrong, I drool over Ethan Allen, Thomasville and Henredon. But come on, really. I'd much rather invest in education & memories, or even a car or home repairs! This coming weekend we're going to pack a picnic and head back to Bernheim Forest to hike some of the trails we've already picked out on their map. Then Sunday we're going to the St James Art Festival which is always very cool. Otter Creek is doing something fun too which I wanted to squeeze in, but we've got a lot of chores that need attention too and I have to some yard work :o(. I hate yard work!!! Phooey! So maybe if we get most of the work done, we can hit Otter Creek too! We shall see...

Bittersweet: Breakup & Kids

This is Rachael with Lexie & Logan Nall. Two of the sweetest, most well behaved kids I know (of course including my girls, nieces & nephews as well). When their father, Kelly, ended our 3 1/2 year relationship in the very beginning of this summer, I was hurt (it was the first time that anyone has ever broken up with me) and somewhat, but not terribly surprised. What did devastate & surprise me was his admission that he had cheated on me with his current friend Kat, an old classmate from Ball State University. Apparently they'd made an emotional & physical connection before Kelly broke up with me. She was in the process of getting divorced and told Kelly that she had been in love with him since their 1 year together in college over 23 years ago. I am kind of blown away by the idea of that kind of love - very powerful.
As for Kelly & I...well, about a year ago, he suggested moving in together, engagement, all that jazz. I think it might have been then that I panicked and started back-peddling. I'd been drifting away and emotionally disconnecting for almost a full year. He was lonely & sad, I felt guilty & sad. Up until that last month he had been asking me to make more time for him...and I couldn't - I don't know why. He is a funny, brilliant, self-taught, sweet man who is very social & fun-loving. I had enjoyed my time with him, he was a good companion. For a while, he was my best friend as well as my boyfriend. And I did love him...I did. I just think that we both had our hang-ups & expectations and neither one of us lived up to each others'. If there are different levels of love, then maybe we didn't love each other enough. Or maybe we did but it's true what they say, sometimes love just isn't enough. Who really knows?
During the course of the summer he told me over and over that he needed me in his life, that I was very important to him, he didn't want to lose my friendship and that he would love me always. Now being the creature of habit that I was, all I wanted to do all summer was get back into his arms - back to my comfort zone. And it happened. But it changed nothing except to make me realize that I really didn't want to be the bad, bad ex-girlfriend. So I ended the "friendship" that we tried to maintain over the summer. It was too hard and I had finally started going through this angry stage for a bit. But anger doesn't fit me well, I could never hang on to it and why would I even want to? In the end, I realized I had gotten over him quicker than expected just by ending our communication. These days when I think about him, I think about Kat too. They look very similar to me, like they belong together, it's something about them. I never could see that in my pictures with Kelly. Maybe it's all about perception...

The tragic part of this for me is the loss of the children. This has been my first relationship with someone who had children of their own. I grew to love them as they loved me. I didn't want to lose them, but I had to do the right thing. Rachael & I both suffered in this together. Lexie (11) was one of her best friends. They were 2 peas in a pod, the same age, the same ideals, the same attitude, the same propensity for getting into mischief. Logan (8) will become another Renaissance Man, brilliant, artistic, inquisitive, sensitive and well-mannered (as both children are). He is so much like his father. We had spent as much time with them as we could this summer before school started. They were like sunshine, but being around them was bittersweet...both soothing & a bit painful as well. I still miss them. We both do. I hope that one day in the future when things settle down we'll be able to see them on occasion. Until then, children are highly resilient and life goes on...

JTown Gaslight Festival Parade

Kendall at the Jeffersontown Gaslight Festival Parade high fiving the zombies passing by.

All kinds of critters in this parade. It's a small town neighborly social event. I love it!


My middle daughter, Lauren with husband Timmy. Her cousin, Alexandria and fiance Ryan.
My eldest niece Vickie and her best friend (and closest cousin) Lil' Theresia. They're about the same age.